Heartbreak On Monster Island Chapter 4

Otto wasn't alone when Julia called him at the office. He'd been meeting with a co-worker, one of his staff. Having finished with their business, the conversation had naturally turned to the miscarriage.

Though he still had rough moments, Otto found himself at this moment fairly numb to the whole thing. Still, not wanting to appear shallow to Lucy, he managed to work himself into plausible grief. She responded so genuinely that he was moved in turn, and felt his grief become more real. "It's been hard," he said.

"Everyone focuses on the mother," said Lucy. "The father needs help, too."

Lucy offered to take Otto out for a drink after work. "You've got to recharge a little so you can be there for Julia," she said.

Otto knew she was right. His phone rang. Both their eyes went to caller ID; it was Julia. "I'll talk to you later," Lucy mouthed, though Otto hadn't yet picked it up.

Julia's voice sounded strong in his ear. "I just wanted to see how you were doing," she said, with warm humility that told him she was grateful for their talk that morning, when she had been so down.

"Oh, you know," he said. "Moment to moment."

"I feel better. I was thinking about going for a walk this afternoon. Do you want to come home a little early and join me?"

"Oh," he said.

"We could make it later—like six? The light is so pretty these days, in Riverside Park."

"That sounds so great, it's just that there's this stupid thing I have to deal with. I'll try, definitely, but I guess don't wait for me."

"Oh," she said. "Well, that's okay. Anyway, I just want to say hi."

He didn't know why he had lied. He could have just told her that people from work wanted to take him out, and he'd already said yes. Or he could have rescheduled with Lucy. It didn't matter. The point was, Lucy was a good friend, and he just needed a break from the situation. He smiled to shake off the lie's bitter aftertaste and went over to Lucy's cube.

Under other circumstances, apart from miscarriages and phone calls, Otto and Lucy would have gone out for happy hour about once every eight days, along with any of three or four others in the office, in groups of two or three or four. They'd talk about work or their respective social lives, have one and a half more than they should have, and get home late for dinner.

This time felt different from the start. They hadn't asked any of the others along nor mentioned where they were going, by some silent understanding. Otto felt oddly self-conscious about holding the door for Lucy, though he'd always done so. He was aware of her hands folded in her lap in the cab, and the way she stood beside and behind him while he paid the fare.